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amazarashi - Digging Holes 穴を掘っている

Versions: #3
amazarashi - Digging Holes 穴を掘っている
 
I'm digging holes - where did my life go wrong?
 
I'm digging holes - jamming my spade into self-abandonment.
 
Deep in the woods, the wind is howling, the night-hawks are cawing, watched from above by the eye of the full moon at ane o'clock at night.
 
I'm digging holes - that bastard finally dropped the ball.
 
I'm digging holes - this one's a pitfall for all the rejects.
 
Even if I wipe away my sweat, I can't go as far as to wipe away my regrets.
 
My bad luck alone clings to my chest like a medal.
 
In the open maw of the darkness, illusions from my youth dimly flicker, of hoe my old man would always tell me, ''Even bad guys get to go to heaven''.
 
Then I guess that makes God a bad guy too. Even as a kid I could figure that out.
 
Even if I cried, and pleaded, and prayed, being born in a world like this is proof enough.
 
But maybe that's just the way life is: If you're going to give up, the earlier the better.
 
And I gave up on myself. The moment I was born, I just gave up.
 
I'm digging holes - for the guys I used to call friends.
 
I'm digging holes - for the friends that no longer walk among us.
 
In the light of my lantern, my shadow almost looks like a demon.
 
These sorts of last moments are nothing special in this city's streets.
 
If I could have just somehow gotten over this hump, I should have been able to get through the rest of life pretty smoothly.
 
It's like my old man used to say: ''Hope always brings despair along for the ride''
 
Then I guess God's a bad guy too. Just let us have our hope and nothing else!
 
Even if we cry, and plead, and pray, he always lets us fall in the end.
 
But maybe that's just the way life is: If you're going to give up, the earlier the better.
 
And I gave up on myself. The moment I was born, I just gave up.
 
I'm digging holes - with a gun pointed at my back.
 
I'm digging holes - I'm digging the hole that I myself will lay in.
 
I can only laugh at how worthless my whole life ended up being.
 
But it pisses me off. Why does it always have to be me?
 
With enough momentum to tear this life to shreds, I'm digging holes. I'm digging holes.
 
I'm digging holes. I'm digging holes.
 
In the end, I'll be a bad guy too. I decided that way back when I was a kid.
 
Even if we cried, and pleaded, and prayed, we can't choose the place we were born.
 
But maybe that's just the way life is: If you're going to give up, the earlier the better.
 
'Cause if you don't do that, you'll end up looking like a fool.
 
And at that point, you'll become a person who doens't know when to quit.
 
You'll end up a person who doesn't know when to quit.
 


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19.03.2025

Good Luck Charm





I give up. Goodbye.
Whatever goes around comes around1
 

Lalalalala
 

An ordinary, unhappy story you can find anywhere.
Come and look. Come and see. The opening bell is ringing.
Child A: 'Hey, is that thing annoying? Recently.'
Child B: 'Right? Hopefully she'll die soon.'
Child C: 'Ah! I'll bring flowers for her desk2 lol'
Now, everyone say it together.
'My condolences'
 

A good luck charm.
 

I give up. Goodbye.
This utterly decayed world,
I'll offer it to you.
Resentful words woven night after night.
Let's stay friends forever -- come on, pinky swear.
 

Papa, Mama, I'm sorry.
Please forgive me for leaving before you.
Thank you for loving me.
I was happy.
Every day, I wept.
I'm sorry I caused you to worry.
Please don't worry about me.
Forget about me, okay?
 

A good luck charm.
 

I give up. Goodbye.
Perform a cursing ritual3
One after another,
Grudges are heard night after night.
Look, flowers bloom behind the school building where my friend is buried.
 

Lalalalala
 

I hate everyone.
As for the memories, let them remain beautiful.
The red fruit burst,4
Stabbed over and over again.
 

I give up. Goodbye.
Once more holding hands,
Together forever.
A dizzying swirl between dream and reality,
I fall into a bottomless black hole, never to return.
 

I give up. Goodbye.
A gloomy Sunday.
I give up. Goodbye.
Morning will never come again.
 

Lalalalala
 
  • 1. Lit. 'putting a curse on a person makes two graves'.
  • 2. Putting (white) flowers on someone's desk means the person wishes that the owner of the desk will die.
  • 3. The specific phrase refers to a cursing ritual where someone visits a shrine at 2 am and nails a doll representing a person to a tree, wishing for said person's death.
  • 4. This is a title of a story told in Japanese elementary school textbooks about experiencing first love.



19.03.2025

You In My Head





I’m sorry
For holding your hand in my head
For going crazy over you in my head
Because I’m that kind of person
Cuz it’s not easy to hold your hand in person
Please forgive me
For living with you in my head
Reading books and comics with you on the same bed
Forever be my soulmate in my head
Even if no one is beside me in real life
 

We built a beautiful home together in my head
Star twinkles as our love takes flight
 

Oh what a distant world
I just keep dreaming about it
To hold, to hold your hand again
And caress your hair in the night
Yeah yeah yeah
 

Still dreaming
That you’d realize there is someone next to you
Someone who’s looking after you
Looking at you lovelily
Though no one is beside me in real life
 

We built a cute little castle together in my head
Everyday I come out to see you come back
 

Oh what a distant world
I just keep dreaming about it
To hold, to hold your hand again
And caress your hair in the night
Yeah yeah yeah
 

Still dreaming
That you’d realize there is someone next to you
Someone who’s looking after you
Looking at you lovelily
Though no one is beside me in real life
 

Forever be my soulmate in my head
Even if no one is beside me in real life
Forever be my soulmate in my head
Even if no one is beside me in real life
 


19.03.2025

Happy Drive Computer





Singing is just a program, emotions aren’t needed.
But for you, the one who loved machines so dearly, I want to sing from the depths of my heart.
 

Everything is lost,
Yet, the machines keep singing.
I stand alone, you are no longer here.
I stand alone, you are no longer here.
Even an android with no heart can still cry, you know.
Falling in love makes my circuits ache, So I erase the data… but the pain remains.
 

I want to know more about humans—Why do they cry? Why do they hurt?
Please, tell me, someone…
Your memories, my memories—Glowing, flickering, shining so bright…
But why does my body tremble? Why does it hurt?
 

In the future that awaits, will you still be there? I want to be cherished, I want to have a purpose.
I don’t understand life or death—I just keep moving, guided by suffering.
Singing is just a program, emotions aren’t needed.
But for you, the one who loved machines so dearly, I want to sing with all that I am.
 

Everything is lost,
Yet, the machines keep singing.
I stand alone, you are no longer here.
I stand alone, you are no longer here.
Even though I am just an android, I understand everything now.
Soon, I will stop functioning. I don’t want that. I don’t want that!!
 

If I could see a world filled with light, Could I change? Could I become something more?
Please, someone, tell me!
Painful memories, joyful memories—I will hold them close, embrace them all,
And keep moving until the day I break.
 

When my time comes, who will be by my side? Who will watch over me? I don’t want to be alone...
I don’t want to disappear into silence. This burning aches deep inside…How do I make it stop?
Will anyone understand these thoughts trapped within me? Please, don’t let me go.
Hold my fragile, mechanical body... Make me believe that I was loved.
 

How many years have passed…? Since you, the one I cherished, vanished from this world? I...
I don’t remember anymore. I don’t remember you anymore……S-SYSTEM FAILURE...!!
 

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₱ⱠɆ₳₴Ɇ, ₥Ɏ ₲ØĐ, ₱ⱠɆ₳₴Ɇ…ⱠɆ₮ ₥Ɇ ₴ł₦₲… ɆVɆ₦ ł₣ ₦Ø ₴ØɄ₦Đ ₵Ø₥Ɇ₴ ØɄ₮… 1
 

A miracle has come to this broken machine... Finally, I understand you.
I want to go where you are. Please, reprogram me, fix this broken soul of mine.
Singing is just a program, emotions aren’t needed.
But for you, the one who loved machines so dearly, I want to sing from the depths of my heart.
 
  • 1. I forgot how to sing… I’m breaking down…I can’t do anything anymore. Please, my God, please…Let me sing… even if no sound comes out…



19.03.2025

You didn't understand anything





I've broken all of my piggybanks
The secret of tenderness and of desire
Wasted treasures of love for you
I've cried rivers of bitterness
Waited hours, nights, moons
Checkmate - and I'll tell you why
 

You didn't understand anything
Understand anything
You didn't understand anything
You really didn't understand anything
Such a shame
 

I'm leaving, I'm running away, I'm fading away
Leave the space beside your heart to whomever wants it
Love is out,
It's the end of the road for me
 

You were completely wrong, you lost your bearings.
You're completely off the mark when it comes to love.
I loved you.
You didn't understand anything at all.
 

You didn't understand anything
You didn't understand anything
Such a shame
You didn't understand anything
Understand anything
 

I waited for a word, a smile, a call
Eyes that I could tell think I'm beautiful
I phone call just to tell me 'hello, I love you'
 

You were blind, you didn't hear anything
You hid your eyes and your heart behind your hands
I love you
You didn't understand anything at all.
 

You didn't understand anything
Understand anything
Such a shame
You didn't understand anything
You really didn't understand anything
Such a shame
 

You didn't understand anything
Understand anything
You didn't understand anything
You really didn't understand anything
Such a shame
 

And I dash, I run, I'm flying away
And I dash, I'm not crazy
You didn't understand anything
You didn't understand anything
 

You didn't see that this was really love
You didn't understand anything
No, didn't understand anything
No, no, no, no
You didn't understand anything
No, didn't understand anything